Galloway Day 13 - 30m - Confusion

Here's what I don't get.

On Sunday I did just shy of 5 miles. A decent pace - not great - 18m - but did it. And felt tired - but okay.

Then today I used my new Gymboss interval timer to do the run/walk interval for 30 minutes - and my shins were KILLING ME.

How can I go 5 miles okay and not 30 minutes okay?

Ugh. It's frustrating. It makes me wonder about my abilities to keep pace - and that leads me to doubts - and fear - and that is the path to the dark side.

I'm hopeful for my meeting with the dietician next week. I'm doing what she asked - and tracking what I eat - and seeing patterns - seeing why I seem to hover - I go up a few - down a few. And I'm making a conscious effort to break the patterns. But I want to know what her plan for me is.

I have roughly 90 days until the race. That's LOTS of time to train and lose weight to get faster.

But I doubt myself at times.

Thank goodness YOU all are here to remind me to believe in myself.

EPCOT AWAITS!

Galloway Day 11 - 30m interrupted

Well I haven't been updating as much as I've wanted lately - but that's getting better. I'm averaging 3/week - as opposed to 1. Let's see if we can boost it. This is a useful forum for me to communicate with myself - as well as give you a peek inside my mind.

So let's update.

Diet/Food - things here are going according to plan. I'm logging everything I'm eating, and noticing some trends and patterns. I'm sure this is what the dietician wanted me to do - and I look forward to seeing her again on October 5 to review them, and also to weigh in and see if the exercise and "counting" is putting me on the right track.

Exercise - a few bumps - but doing good. Sticking to the Galloway plan - 2 days of 30m walk/run with 1 long run each week. However - here are the bumps. My interval timer - stopped working. After two uses. I called, and they're sending another. Ugh. And this morning's 30 minutes was interrupted about halfway in by a very urgent call to the restroom. So I'm going to REDO today's 30m tomorrow in preparation for 5 miles on Sunday.

General wellbeing - I think I'm doing alright. My emotions are a little closer to the surface than normal - which is one of the things I talked about with my counselor yesterday. Oh right - I had a counseling appointment yesterday. First one. I really like this counselor. She seemed very friendly, a good listener, and like someone who wants to help me figure out what I'm going through - help me through it - and see me a better, healthier person on the other side. So hey - if you're reading this doc - THANKS - I felt good just coming to meet you.

Other stuff - things here are generally going in a normal direction. Elizabeth is nearly TWO. When did THAT happen? Oh and a quick shout-out to the "Magic" to my "Mayhem" - Bryan Ripper - now DADDY of a beautiful little boy. Go over to Facebook and say hi.

And I'm really excited about tonight. I get to perform MAGIC at my mom's retirement home. My first actual PAID magic gig. :) How cool is that?

And I'll leave you with a video of one of the tricks I'll be performing tonight - the classic of magic - the Cups and Balls - as interpreted by Lance Burton.

EPCOT AWAITS!

Galloway Day 10 - 30m

So I'm back from Vegas with a QUICK update (I have to get to court).

I haven't done my 30m today yet - that'll be later - I only have one court date, and then I'm home - so I'll do it during baby nap time. :)

Vegas went well - did good with food and exercise. So I feel good about that.

A good friend of mine opined that the training will help with the races, but that I should "follow the dietician's instructions to the letter" - to ensure we finally figure out how to get this weight off. I agree totally. And my first homework assignment is to track EVERYTHING I eat for the next two weeks. And I'm using the app above to do it.

It gives me an interesting view of things from above. Calories, fat, salt, etc. And then we'll review it - create a plan - and work together going forward.

I'm also considering some additional counseling. I feel like there's some unresolved stuff (emotional) surrounding everything I've been through in the last 24 months (loss of job, creating a business, moving family to us, having a baby, dad passing, grandmother passing, etc) that I need to process. And if that's a component of why I'm struggling - it's time to deal with it.

In other words - it seems like I have a good plan going forward. And I'll have experts supporting me along the way!

EPCOT AWAITS!

Vegas Bound

I'm off to a CLE in Vegas. I know - poor me. :)

I have my training gear, and I've already determined that Aria to the Mirage and back is my 2 miler for Galloway this weekend. :)

I had my first appointment with the dietician yesterday - and we talked a lot about a lot of things. She wants me to focus on some of my problem areas, and really track what I'm consuming over the next three weeks - and then at my next appointment we're going to make a six month food plan to compliment my training - and also really jumpstart some more weight loss.

I feel positive about the experience - although parts of it were hard. Admitting to myself some of my behaviors and triggers. It was like therapy at times.

But enough of that.

I'm goin' to VEGAS baby! :)

EPCOT AWAITS!

Galloway Day 6 - 4.06 miles - 1:12

Okay - a few updates.

1) Completed my 4 miler today - slow and steady. My interval timer is helping with my 30 minute workouts - and the long runs will catch up. This week's schedule: T - 30; Th - 30; Sa - 2miles.

2) Regarding the "weight loss surgery" conversation. First of all - I agree with all of you - I don't want to have it. Secondly - all I said was that we're going to evaluate my progress at my birthday and if I'm still struggling after devoting all my energy to weight loss - then we'll consider all other options. Hadn't decided on one yet. And hopefully won't have to. :)

But I LOVE ALL OF YOU for the comments! (Yes, even you mgreene - although you missed the point of the "line in the sand" analogy by simply asking why the "before" hadn't happened - some of it did - some of it is still - and some of it didn't. Regardless - I'm moving forward)

At my doctor's suggestion I have an appointment with a dietician on Tuesday to help me with my progress and hopefully avoid that "other" conversation. I really like and trust my doctor. And she's not pushing any one course, just wants me to succeed.

That all being said.

Ten years ago we as a country were damaged.

And today we remember it. And honor the fallen. And pledge to do good with our lives.

Let's all do one good thing for someone else today.

THAT is what America is.

EPCOT AWAITS!

A Line in the Sand

Okay - first a few updates - then today's topic.

1) Salish Lodge was beautiful - we had a very nice night. And had a really good time.

2) I finally (yesterday) got my GymBoss Interval Buzzing Timer Wrist thingy. And I tried it out this morning at a 10/50 Galloway interval. It was a shorter run - but my pace quickened to 16:30 - which is VERY nice. Tomorrow I'll be doing my Galloway 30minutes - and Saturday or Sunday - 4 miles. I'm still on track with the plan - but this week my days are a little messed up. Busy week.

3) Weight. I'm down a little more - as you can see in the sidebar. I'm at 352. Down 9. But not enough for my tastes.

Which brings me to today's post.

I saw my doctor yesterday for my yearly physical and to check my BP. My BP is good (but regulated by medicine). My health overall is good. I'm strong and active. But the weight isn't coming off.

And she asked me point blank. "So - what are we doing about this weight thing? I see you struggling, and I want you to see your grandchildren get married." It wasn't a new statement, but I thought for a moment before answering. I know she thinks I should consider weight loss surgery. But I'm not there yet.

And then I remembered something from about 13 years ago.

Originally I wanted to be a doctor. Was even accepted into a medical program. Accelerated too. But halfway through it I was really struggling. I wasn't "getting" some of the more advanced sciences. And I had a long talk with my Dad who asked me if this was right for me. Was I doing the right thing.

And I thought to myself - well - I'm living at the dorms - and enjoying a lot of my time. Maybe that's not the ticket. Maybe I'm not really "TRYING" - maybe I'm goofing off too much.

"Well Dad, if I really try - if I apply myself 100% and it's still not for me - then I can accept it. But until I've really applied every ounce I have - I won't give up."

So I moved home for a semester. Studied with my dad every single night. And still wasn't making the grades I needed. I knew I couldn't give it any more. So I looked for other options. And now I'm a very successful trial lawyer.

What the heck does this have to do with weight?

Well - I came to the realization at the doctor's office that I'm training - and watching what I eat. But I haven't really "DIETED" or "pushed myself" on the weight loss front. I haven't applied every ounce I have to it. And until I do - I won't give up.

So here's what we did. We drew two lines in the sand together - my doctor and me.

First line is today. It's right here. Now. There's everything behind it - and there's NOW. And as of now - we are applying 150% to weight loss and health. Not just training and "watching what I eat" - but actually dieting. Consuming less. Consuming healthier food. Not giving in to temptations. And LOSING weight. I'll weigh in every two weeks. And we'll see the change. I will not give up.

The second line in the sand is April 17, 2012. My 34th birthday.

If we get there, and I can honestly say that I've dedicated my resources to losing weight and getting healthier - we will gauge my success. If I'm making significant progress - we'll keep going.

But if I've really really tried everything. And the weight isn't coming off fast enough for my health - we'll have a talk about other options and what's available to me.

I do NOT want to have that talk.

So I guess my only other option is to apply myself. HARD. I've done a lot in my life. Accomplished many many things.

And this - this is the next one.

EPCOT AWAITS!

Galloway Day 3 - 2.96 miles - 56 minutes

Alllllright. I feel great after today's workout. Now - I know it was slow - but that's not the point. It was 3 miles! Longer than I've done in a long while.

And as a reward? A night at the BEAUTIFUL Salish Lodge (seen above) tonight. Very excited about it.

Congratulations to all my teammates who did the Disneyland Half today! You guys ROCK! See you all soon (January is right around the corner).

EPCOT AWAITS!

Galloway Day 2 - 1.46m - 30 minutes

WARNING: Today's post may ramble - and might be emotional.

First some business - today I did 1.46 in 30 minutes. Slower than Tuesday - but I had other things on my mind as you'll soon see.

Thank you to all the commenters and posters on Tuesday - contrary to popular belief - I was still here too - just not posting a lot. As we get closer to Marathon Weekend - that'll change. Amanda - yes - I'll be there with you - celebrating!

Now.

Today is September 1.

And today is my dad's birthday. Or would have been. Or is. I honestly don't know which is proper. Or if it matters.

The fact is - he would have been 65 years old today.

And that got me thinking - he's been gone a year and a half now. He was only 63 years old when he died. It was too young. Too soon. Too early. And I look at my daughter and my heart breaks that he isn't here with her to see her grow.

I know that he sees her. I know he's with us.

But it's different. I mean - I can still talk to him - and do - but it's very one sided.

I choose on his birthday to remember him in his prime. In his 30s and 40s. Before the bypass. Before diabetes. Before the COPD.

He could make me smile and laugh with a smile, a joke, or just by being there.

He imparted to me the value of tradition - love - life.

And of course - he shared with me some of the things I'd come to love as dearly as my own self through the years.

And whether he enjoyed it or not - he never let me think he was doing anything but having a great time.

This was a man who celebrated every second of his life.

And although I could talk about why it was too soon. And how weight affected him. And how I don't want to share his fate. And how I'm nowhere near half done with life at 33.....

Instead, for today at least, I choose to celebrate him. I choose to remember him.

And as I do every single day since February 25, 2010, I choose to miss him.

EPCOT AWAITS.